Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Feeling unworthy

For many, feeling or being unworthy is bad, negative, something it's best to not feel. I disagree. Let me explain why. Lately, in my personal life, many events occurred that made me feel unworthy of many things. I'm not here to discuss about these things. It's irreleaveant to make the point I'm trying to expose here. 

There's a strange feeling that comes with feeling unworthy and it's feeling like your a fraud of some kind. That you might be the only one seeing a truth and whatever benefits you've been given is not earned or would not exists if others knew the truth. What's strange about it is that the benefits are usually strong enough to overcome the bad sides of feeling unworthy. So for a second, you feel ashamed to ignore that you're unworthy and you start abusing of the situation by ignoring it. I think it's more frequent than it looks for most of us. Because it becomes an automatism to ignore it. 

For the record, its opposite, feeling that you don't get what you deserve, is a much more evident feeling. Let's use an image. Imagine yourself as a glass of water, normally half full, when unworthy, the glass is closer to be full and when you don't get what you deserve, the glass is closer to be empty. Which glass you're more subjected to complain about? The one that is closer to be empty right?. But that doesn't mean that the glass closer to be full is better. It simply means it ain't right. And feeling unworthy is as not right as feeling that you don't get what you deserve. 

What do psycho pop tells us about what to do when you feel you don't get what you deserve? To take the necessary means to get what you think you deserve. To not sit there waiting for it. To take it. Well, if you're following where I'm going. I think that feeling unworthy is exactly the same, except it's harder to take action. 

Feeling unworthy, should be a powerful tool for anyone. Instead of ignoring it to get rid of the feeling, I suggest to identify it and use it to improve yourself. If you can control the level of water in your own glass, then you'll less of a fraud, more authentic, more you, a better you. 

So how can you use it? Well first and foremost, to see the truth. To not lie to yourself. When you feel unworthy, it's like your subconscious is talking to you. So like feeling that you don't get what you deserve, you have to take action. You have to level yourself to be worthy of what benefits you already have. I know it's hard. I think it's a state of mind very few can achieve. It's being aware and in control of yourself. To not be lazy about it. 

If you've followed my glass of water analogy you probably understand that I was not talking about removing water out of it when it's closer to be full. That I was suggesting to grow the glass bigger so the water level gets to be half full again. That's why feeling unworthy isn't a bad thing. It's a great thing. It's a call to grow and if you listen to it and you take action. You'll grow.


  1. Interesting post. Feeling unworthy ; a universal , eventual , feeling. And a bad one .

    If you haven't, already, check out David Foster Wallace's story collection Oblivion . Feeling unworthy and the many doors it opens is definitely included in the stories.

  2. I haven't. The only thing I've read about David Foster Wallace was "This is water" and I got "A supposedly fun thing I'll never do again" on the shelf.

    I'll sure add Oblivion next.