Yesterday, I had the most interesting conversation with the girl I used to have feelings for in a long time. She probably knows me better than my friends do. Well, she knows what I always wanted her to know, so I thought that she may not be aware of all the twists in my mind. You know how it is, you never want to be the nutcase weirdo that gives the creeps to others. Especially if you're falling for that particular other. But the fact is, if you get close to someone, eventually they'll figure that you're a weirdo anyway. I mean, if you're one like me. And she did well to figure it out.
So back to the conversation I had with her. Well, the subject of it doesn't really matters. What lead me to write about it was a simple sentence she said about how differently we approach and solve events in our respectives life. She said : "You know that's what you do. Spending most time thinking on how to react than reacting.". I'm not saying I'm the only one who does or others never do. But it came clear to me the subject of our discussion was about instincs. If something appends and the instant after you react to it. The way you'll do it, comes directly from your instincts.
So I'm questionning myself. What are my instincts? Where do they comes from? How I learned them? I know some people are more impulsive than others. So they probably rely more on their own instincts. They are the ones who are more fit to get their shit back together and do whatever needs to be done to get over it. They don't need to think about the consequences or about the best way to do it. They just do it and they'll deal with the next event if needed.
During the conversation, my friend also told me she thinks there's no good way to behave. You can either lean back, and think about it, or act right away relying on your instincts. Well that's not her words but that's what she meant. I think I disagree. If you step back and think before you decide what to do, that maybe means you're not confident that it'll do any good to rely on them. If my instinct are "me". Shouldn't I thrust them? Isn't what self-confidence is all about? Thrusting you're instincts? I think I should do it more often.
So back to the conversation I had with her. Well, the subject of it doesn't really matters. What lead me to write about it was a simple sentence she said about how differently we approach and solve events in our respectives life. She said : "You know that's what you do. Spending most time thinking on how to react than reacting.". I'm not saying I'm the only one who does or others never do. But it came clear to me the subject of our discussion was about instincs. If something appends and the instant after you react to it. The way you'll do it, comes directly from your instincts.
So I'm questionning myself. What are my instincts? Where do they comes from? How I learned them? I know some people are more impulsive than others. So they probably rely more on their own instincts. They are the ones who are more fit to get their shit back together and do whatever needs to be done to get over it. They don't need to think about the consequences or about the best way to do it. They just do it and they'll deal with the next event if needed.
During the conversation, my friend also told me she thinks there's no good way to behave. You can either lean back, and think about it, or act right away relying on your instincts. Well that's not her words but that's what she meant. I think I disagree. If you step back and think before you decide what to do, that maybe means you're not confident that it'll do any good to rely on them. If my instinct are "me". Shouldn't I thrust them? Isn't what self-confidence is all about? Thrusting you're instincts? I think I should do it more often.
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